Been there, done that, got the t shirt? Not necessarily, you’re not like anybody else on the planet and neither for that matter is your date. You don’t have to follow old rules, new rules or precedents about what you want, where you want to go, or how you act.  If it’s ok with the two of you and its legal then go ahead and be creative.

This isn’t code for sex by the way, it’s about not being jaded, being original and finding the courage to act and be who you really are. You can do this individually or together. It’s much more fun together. Be willing to experiment, have a go, remember 50 and dating is the new 40 and dating.  It is amazing how interesting you can be when you follow your own heart. 50 and over is a great place to be when dating, honestly. You have probably realised (just by being here for 50 years or over) that life is full of compromises, well guess what as long as you are happy to make those compromises so be it. If you don’t want then don’t settle it really is all up to you. What most people regret in life (especially as it becomes shorter) are not the mistakes they made on the way, but the chances they didn’t take.

Dating as a mature woman can be quite daunting simply because you know far about life than you did when you were twenty one and you find yourself becoming more choosy. The thing is that your ambitions are totally different from when you were dating in your early twenties and so you need a partner who shares the same aspirations and views as you do. The only problem is finding the perfect man without the pubbing and clubbing scene. Even then, what sort of guy is likely to be propping up a bar at his age?

Online dating offer an easy and fun way to hand pick a man that meets your criteria. Here are the three top reasons for consideration –

• Online dating begins in the safety and comfort of your own home and there is no need to worry about going out to find men, especially if you are a single mature woman with married friends.
• You can create a profile that tells a potential date, all about you. Always be as honest as you can and give your true age with a recent photo. Detail all of your interests and dislikes including smoking for instance. Hopefully, you will only get replies from men with similar views and interests.
• You can emails over a extended period and really get a feel for your potential date before making any commitment to meet. Once you do decide to meet, it can take away the awkwardness because you already know what you have in common.

Whilst online dating will take the leg work out dating it can be open to abuse by conmen who prey on vulnerable women, so it is always very important not to give away too much personal information on line.

Men. How to write a great online dating profile

To write a great online dating profile then consider this chaps-

• Who you are?

Self-awareness is a very valuable tool, if you don’t know who you are, then how can your   potential dates be expected to?  They could always guess!  I guess, So figure it out, your likes and dislikes, strengths and weakness’s, tastes in music, food, travel etc….  Do an inventory, if you’re a sensitive soul, say so… The truth is self awareness brings action and power to the dating game, without it the potential for fun can be missed.

• Where are you psychologically?

Are you in a good place emotionally? Or are you feeling sad, lonely and blue, because, Gill suddenly decides she just wants to be just good friends?  Giving yourself time out can be rewarding. Learning to enjoy your own company and rediscovering the old you, without interruption, can be a positive experience. When not to begin dating will be personal to you, several pitfalls to avoid would be:

• Your Married
• You’ve lost your job
• You’ve lost a parent, good friend, dog
• You’re lost
• You’re still involved ( or not moved on)
• You’ve been divorced for less than a year (give yourself that space)
• You’ve lost your house

• Be honest.

Be honest, be precise, and be specific. If you only have one chance to write on line, write it on paper first. Take the above into account and use it. Don’t allow yourself to trot out the usual trite phrases, “enjoy nights in” of course you do, most of us do in the UK especially in winter! Rather use the space to be slightly more inventive, eye catching without being dishonest. If your 5ft 8” and enjoy train spotting, don’t pretend to be 6ft 1” and an aerodynamic engineer, you will be found out. It also won’t help you to find the person who will accept you for who you are.

• Have a recent easily identifiable photo

The number of responses, increase dramatically with a good photograph. Use a fairly recent photo. Avoid old photo’s that no longer represent the person you are now, it doesn’t pay to have a discrepancy between the picture and what you really look like.  Don’t have your “significant x” on it! It is really off putting to a potential date, also props like big cars, motorbikes, it is much nicer if you are just you.

• Check Spelling and Punctuation

Spell-check your ad. Correct grammar and punctuation.  It’s easier than you think, Word will auto correct your spellings, if you can, get a friend to proofread. Even if this is all on the QT it pays to get it looking right.

• Avoid misunderstandings when describing yourself.

Unless you can make eye contact with your potential date, the idea of describing yourself as hunky, with a good sense of humour, is fraught with difficulties; nobody knows how somebody else will interpret something as personal, as looks or humour! For example some of my friends think I’m witty… my children and partner think I’m too caustic!  Big difference. Somebody somewhere must find Mr Bean funny, I for one find him embarrassing Make sure what you’re saying is what your described and representative of you.

• Don’t make a dating profile toooo long.

We all know women get easily get bored especially when something boring like the world cup final is on! So keep it short, to the point, and above all keep them wanting more

over 50’s dating
over fifty dating

Writing a dating profile can be compared to writing a CV. They are both resumes after all.  There are many sites offering to write, or re-write your CV’s but not many to help you write a dating profile. A thoroughly modern online dating profile works best when you consider -;

• Who you are?

Self-awareness is a very valuable tool, if you don’t know who you are, then how can your   potential dates be expected to?  They could always guess!  I guess, So figure it out, your likes and dislikes, strengths and weakness’s, tastes in music, food, travel etc….  Do an inventory, if you’re a sensitive soul, say so… The truth is self awareness brings action and power to the dating game, without it the potential for fun can be missed.

• Where are you psychologically?

Are you in a good place emotionally? Or are you feeling sad, lonely and blue, because, Jack just hit the road?  Giving yourself time out can be rewarding. Learning to enjoy your own company and rediscovering the old you, without interruption, can be a positive experience. When not to begin dating will be personal to you, several pitfalls to avoid would be:

• Your Married
• You’ve lost your job
• You’ve lost a parent, good friend, dog
• You’re lost
• You’re still involved ( or not moved on)
• You’ve been divorced for less than a year (give yourself that space)
• You’ve lost your house

• Be honest.

Be honest, be precise, and be specific. If you only have one chance to write on line, write it on paper first. Take the above into account and use it. Don’t allow yourself to trot out the usual trite phrases, “enjoy nights in” of course you do, most of us do in the UK especially in winter! Rather use the space to be slightly more inventive, eye catching without being dishonest. If your 5ft 2” and enjoy browsing for antiques, don’t be tempted to say your 5ft 5” and an expert in antiquities, you will be found out. It also won’t help you to find the person who will accept you for who you are.

• Have a recent easily identifiable photo

The number of responses, increase dramatically with a good photograph. Use a fairly recent photo. Avoid unusually flattering, glamour shots; it doesn’t pay to have a discrepancy between the picture and what you really look like.  Don’t have your “significant x” on it! It is really off putting to a potential date, also props like, your cute dog, cats, nieces, nephews, this photo should be about you, a good head shot would be nice.

• Check Spelling and Punctuation

Spell-check your ad. Correct grammar and punctuation.  It’s easier than you think, Word will auto correct your spellings, if you can, get a friend to proofread. Even if this is all on the QT it pays to get it looking right.

• Avoid misunderstandings

Unless you can make eye contact with your potential date, the idea of describing yourself as sexy can be fraught with misunderstanding; Nobody knows how somebody else will interpret something as personal, as humour, or sexiness! For example some of my friends think I’m witty… my children and partner think I’m too caustic!  Big difference. Humour and innuendo are intended to soften, lighten, and divert.  Make sure what your saying makes sense.

• Don’t make a dating profile toooo long.

We all know men easily get bored! On line shopping for them is fun. Their attention can wander pretty quickly. So keep it short, keep to the point, and above all keep them wanting more

over 50’s dating
over fifty dating

Online dating is in our opinion the best way to meet eligable people who share your interests and ambitions. Every year, nearly one hundred thousand people of all ages get married as a direct result of joining an online dating site. Online dating like any dating has a small element of unsavoury people participating hence this advice.

Essential Online Dating Safety Tips

Trust Your Intuition
Your intuition is a powerful tool for knowing when something doesn’t feel quite right. As you read dating profiles, responses to your email messages, have telephone conversations, and meet in person your intuition will help tell you if something is right or wrong. Online dating gives you numerous opportunities to date and so don’t take any chances if something feels wrong.

Don’t Provide Too Much Personal Detail Too Soon
Your home telephone number and your full name will provide an easy way to discover who you are and your address. Armed with your christian and surname, a person can do online searches to potentially discover, where you work and what you do

Use a Free Email Account
Sign up for a free Yahoo!, Hotmail, or Gmail email account that is just for online dating. Never put your complete name in the ‘From’ field – only your first name or something else entirely. My current partner started out with a false name before we decided to meet. This strategy protects you from a person being able to use your usual email address to find out more information about you.

Use a Mobile Phone to Chat
When you decide to chat in person rather than online chat or email, never give out your home phone number. It’s just an added protection until you get to know the person better and build some trust.

Beware of Married Men
It’s unfortunate, but some married men do use online dating services. It’s pretty obvious that they are interested in sex or embroiling you in something you probably don’t need.

Look for Unpleasant Characteristics
As you talk via email and on the phone you may be able to start to pick out some characteristics of the other person. Do they seem to get angry easily? Do they avoid answering some of your questions? Are they controlling? These can be the unpleasant characteristics that tell you this may not be the person for you.

Request a Recent Photo
There’s nothing impolite in asking someone if their photograph’s are recent. If they don’t have a photo then perhaps this is a married person!.  Also, if they tell you the photograph is recent and you meet and see a much older person, then you’ll know the person lied and you can cut the date short if you wish.

Stick to Paid Online Dating
Free online dating services provide a greater opportunity for potentially unsavoury individuals. They don’t need to provide a credit card or any other varifiable information that identifies them. With paid online dating you get what you pay for  including added safety.

Try to Meet in a Public Place.

When it’s time to arrange your first face to face meeting, agree to meet in a public place and provide your own transport. Your first meeting will tell you a lot about the other person, including whether or not they lied in their profile. Never accept an offer to be picked up at your house. Make sure that a friend or relative knows where you are, who you are with and what time you expect to get home. Why not get them to give you a call? You could use this as your excuse to exit if you wish.

Online dating is in our opinion the best way to meet eligable people who share your interests and ambitions. Every year, nearly one hundred thousand people of all ages get married as a direct result of joining an online dating site. Online dating like any dating has a small element of unsavoury people participating hence this advice.

Essential Online Dating Safety Tips

Trust Your Intuition
Your intuition is a powerful tool for knowing when something doesn’t feel quite right. As you read dating profiles, responses to your email messages, have telephone conversations, and meet in person your intuition will help tell you if something is right or wrong. Online dating gives you numerous opportunities to date and so don’t take any chances if something feels wrong.

Don’t Provide Too Much Personal Detail Too Soon
Your home telephone number and your full name will provide an easy way to discover who you are and your address. Armed with your christian and surname, a person can do online searches to potentially discover, where you work and what you do

Use a Free Email Account
Sign up for a free Yahoo!, Hotmail, or Gmail email account that is just for online dating. Never put your complete name in the ‘From’ field – only your first name or something else entirely. My current partner started out with a false name before we decided to meet. This strategy protects you from a person being able to use your usual email address to find out more information about you.

Use a Mobile Phone to Chat
When you decide to chat in person rather than online chat or email, never give out your home phone number. It’s just an added protection until you get to know the person better and build some trust.

Beware of Married Men
It’s unfortunate, but some married men do use online dating services. It’s pretty obvious that they are interested in sex or embroiling you in something you probably don’t need.

Look for Unpleasant Characteristics
As you talk via email and on the phone you may be able to start to pick out some characteristics of the other person. Do they seem to get angry easily? Do they avoid answering some of your questions? Are they controlling? These can be the unpleasant characteristics that tell you this may not be the person for you.

Request a Recent Photo
There’s nothing impolite in asking someone if their photograph’s are recent. If they don’t have a photo then perhaps this is a married person!.  Also, if they tell you the photograph is recent and you meet and see a much older person, then you’ll know the person lied and you can cut the date short if you wish.

Stick to Paid Online Dating
Free online dating services provide a greater opportunity for potentially unsavoury individuals. They don’t need to provide a credit card or any other varifiable information that identifies them. With paid online dating you get what you pay for  including added safety.

Try to Meet in a Public Place.

When it’s time to arrange your first face to face meeting, agree to meet in a public place and provide your own transport. Your first meeting will tell you a lot about the other person, including whether or not they lied in their profile. Never accept an offer to be picked up at your house. Make sure that a friend or relative knows where you are, who you are with and what time you expect to get home. Why not get them to give you a call? You could use this as your excuse to exit if you wish.

over 50’s dating
over fifty dating

Romance is dead – it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.

Dating, reasonable expectations equal good outcomes.

Did you hear about the one who got away? Or was it you that ran away?  The great thing about dating is that isn’t compulsory. You do not have to do it; if you do, then it usually involves a massive leap of faith.  We’ve all heard the tale about the sex kitten that turned out to be a cat; the gorgeous guy form the coca cola adds who turned out to be Mr Bean! Let’s be clear about this, people tell fibs! Me included, I lied about my age, (well it’s a woman’s prerogative isn’t it)?  If you go on a date and decide in an instant that this girl/guy isn’t in any way shape or form, second date material, at least be kind. Walk a mile in their shoes; they probably have very worn soles.  At the very least a drink, a kind word and a bit of banter. You both have online dating in common after all. You will probably gain a friend, a regular online chat, even if it’s hello, how are you, any more dates lined up?  Expectations are sometimes too high; we can behave badly when disappointed. Remember your best friend was once a stranger too

To be avoided at all costs and fraught with potential disaster is the scatter brained idea of talking about your past sexual experiences. Sex feels good for two people whereas talking about past sexual conquests only sounds good for the storyteller. Talking about your ex will add nothing to your future relationship believe me. What exactly is the upside? You will sound either like a sex maniac or a vestal virgin. Your partner will think your motive is to get them to perform to the same level as your ex. Maybe they will be put off by the idea that you blab about stuff or that you compare mental notes after each session. There is absolutely no upside to talking about your past sexual behaviour unless it’s to a Priest or a Psychiatrist.

Over 50 dating or not, first impressions still count.

Mutton dressed as Lamb? No thanks

Dirty or scuffed shoes? No thanks

Cheap wig? No thanks

Roots showing? No thanks

Dirty or chipped nails? No thanks

Makeup like Polyfilla? No thanks

Dating over 50

Over fifty dating

Dating over 40

Over forty dating