A flirt is almost never single – and if he/she is, it is of choice rather than chance! So, if you are over 50 and wish to be a player in the game of love- start by learning how to flirt. Now we know that flirting is an art and it only comes naturally, but a few tips to do it better (and to do it, for novices) for over 50 dating sojourns can never it, can they?! Here are 5 tips for flirting with aplomb while on an over 50 dating spree!

1. Break the ‘touch’-screen – Touching can be one of the most sensitive and yet the most warming of subjects in a date. Irrespective of whether you are on your first date or your twentieth, keep touching her subtly and in a romantic way. This is very tricky – Do it more than necessary and you are a pervert; do it less than what she’s comfortable with, and you end up as a bore! Balance is the key here (as it is probably throughout any over 50 date)!

1. Make her/him laugh – Do not keep serious just because you are on the wrong side of 50! Laugh and have fun like you did during your teenage years on a date. Remember, no one likes a sadist or a bore. So make yourself comfortable and make her laugh, even with the old jokes told in a novel way. Stay away from the dirty ones till you haven’t understood your date enough.

1. Compliments are the key – Keep complimenting your date, even if he/she is not particularly well-dressed for your liking. Remember, she might not look gorgeous today, but that doesn’t stop her from looking awesome the next if she is seriously pretty. So hold your patience and learn to keep her flattered!

1. Body Language matters – Make sure you follow her moves (DON’T STARE!) and duplicate the same subtly. This makes her more comfortable (like both of you putting your elbows on the table), and opens her up for love to make it’s way through!

1. Don’t be too perfect in the art – Don’t let it seem practiced or too perfect. This may have two negative consequences – one, she may mistake you for a Casanova or she may mistake your flirtatiousness for being too eager to be in bed with her. Both – are disastrous for a date. Try and be naïve and genuine in your PDA, and try and not be cocky.

These tips may effectively make you a great flirt – but remember- anything remotely obscene or dirty in your mannerisms and you will be out of the dating recce as fast as you had entered it! Caution is the key in every over 50 dating episode. And once you know you guys are in love, throw it to the winds!

Whats the difference between mature dating and over 50 dating? At least over 50 dating is precise whereas mature dating requires a view to be taken. If we called it ‘middle aged dating’ then life becomes a bit easier because the accepted definition is that middle age starts at 55 years old. For me the word ‘mature’ means dull, past it, over the hill, sensible, tyre kicking and boring. Thats why I hope to remain in peter pan mode and stay a million miles away from ‘mature’. Don’t get me wrong, I am neither feckless or senseless. I just hate the connotations that ‘mature dating’ brings hence my decision for an over 50 dating site.

You can tell when someone really hates you. They sneer and glower and avoid your company. It’s a bit different with dating as it’s more often a slow process of disconnection beit date one or date three. Sure signs are lack of eye contact, sullenness with little verbal interaction, focusing on themselves or physically with bad body language. Read the signs and don’t go flogging a dead horse.

Dating as a mature woman can be quite daunting simply because you know far about life than you did when you were twenty one and you find yourself becoming more choosy. The thing is that your ambitions are totally different from when you were dating in your early twenties and so you need a partner who shares the same aspirations and views as you do. The only problem is finding the perfect man without the pubbing and clubbing scene. Even then, what sort of guy is likely to be propping up a bar at his age?

Online dating offer an easy and fun way to hand pick a man that meets your criteria. Here are the three top reasons for consideration –

• Online dating begins in the safety and comfort of your own home and there is no need to worry about going out to find men, especially if you are a single mature woman with married friends.
• You can create a profile that tells a potential date, all about you. Always be as honest as you can and give your true age with a recent photo. Detail all of your interests and dislikes including smoking for instance. Hopefully, you will only get replies from men with similar views and interests.
• You can emails over a extended period and really get a feel for your potential date before making any commitment to meet. Once you do decide to meet, it can take away the awkwardness because you already know what you have in common.

Whilst online dating will take the leg work out dating it can be open to abuse by conmen who prey on vulnerable women, so it is always very important not to give away too much personal information on line.

Men. How to write a great online dating profile

To write a great online dating profile then consider this chaps-

• Who you are?

Self-awareness is a very valuable tool, if you don’t know who you are, then how can your   potential dates be expected to?  They could always guess!  I guess, So figure it out, your likes and dislikes, strengths and weakness’s, tastes in music, food, travel etc….  Do an inventory, if you’re a sensitive soul, say so… The truth is self awareness brings action and power to the dating game, without it the potential for fun can be missed.

• Where are you psychologically?

Are you in a good place emotionally? Or are you feeling sad, lonely and blue, because, Gill suddenly decides she just wants to be just good friends?  Giving yourself time out can be rewarding. Learning to enjoy your own company and rediscovering the old you, without interruption, can be a positive experience. When not to begin dating will be personal to you, several pitfalls to avoid would be:

• Your Married
• You’ve lost your job
• You’ve lost a parent, good friend, dog
• You’re lost
• You’re still involved ( or not moved on)
• You’ve been divorced for less than a year (give yourself that space)
• You’ve lost your house

• Be honest.

Be honest, be precise, and be specific. If you only have one chance to write on line, write it on paper first. Take the above into account and use it. Don’t allow yourself to trot out the usual trite phrases, “enjoy nights in” of course you do, most of us do in the UK especially in winter! Rather use the space to be slightly more inventive, eye catching without being dishonest. If your 5ft 8” and enjoy train spotting, don’t pretend to be 6ft 1” and an aerodynamic engineer, you will be found out. It also won’t help you to find the person who will accept you for who you are.

• Have a recent easily identifiable photo

The number of responses, increase dramatically with a good photograph. Use a fairly recent photo. Avoid old photo’s that no longer represent the person you are now, it doesn’t pay to have a discrepancy between the picture and what you really look like.  Don’t have your “significant x” on it! It is really off putting to a potential date, also props like big cars, motorbikes, it is much nicer if you are just you.

• Check Spelling and Punctuation

Spell-check your ad. Correct grammar and punctuation.  It’s easier than you think, Word will auto correct your spellings, if you can, get a friend to proofread. Even if this is all on the QT it pays to get it looking right.

• Avoid misunderstandings when describing yourself.

Unless you can make eye contact with your potential date, the idea of describing yourself as hunky, with a good sense of humour, is fraught with difficulties; nobody knows how somebody else will interpret something as personal, as looks or humour! For example some of my friends think I’m witty… my children and partner think I’m too caustic!  Big difference. Somebody somewhere must find Mr Bean funny, I for one find him embarrassing Make sure what you’re saying is what your described and representative of you.

• Don’t make a dating profile toooo long.

We all know women get easily get bored especially when something boring like the world cup final is on! So keep it short, to the point, and above all keep them wanting more

Writing a dating profile can be compared to writing a CV. They are both resumes after all.  There are many sites offering to write, or re-write your CV’s but not many to help you write a dating profile. A thoroughly modern online dating profile works best when you consider -;

• Who you are?

Self-awareness is a very valuable tool, if you don’t know who you are, then how can your   potential dates be expected to?  They could always guess!  I guess, So figure it out, your likes and dislikes, strengths and weakness’s, tastes in music, food, travel etc….  Do an inventory, if you’re a sensitive soul, say so… The truth is self awareness brings action and power to the dating game, without it the potential for fun can be missed.

• Where are you psychologically?

Are you in a good place emotionally? Or are you feeling sad, lonely and blue, because, Jack just hit the road?  Giving yourself time out can be rewarding. Learning to enjoy your own company and rediscovering the old you, without interruption, can be a positive experience. When not to begin dating will be personal to you, several pitfalls to avoid would be:

• Your Married
• You’ve lost your job
• You’ve lost a parent, good friend, dog
• You’re lost
• You’re still involved ( or not moved on)
• You’ve been divorced for less than a year (give yourself that space)
• You’ve lost your house

• Be honest.

Be honest, be precise, and be specific. If you only have one chance to write on line, write it on paper first. Take the above into account and use it. Don’t allow yourself to trot out the usual trite phrases, “enjoy nights in” of course you do, most of us do in the UK especially in winter! Rather use the space to be slightly more inventive, eye catching without being dishonest. If your 5ft 2” and enjoy browsing for antiques, don’t be tempted to say your 5ft 5” and an expert in antiquities, you will be found out. It also won’t help you to find the person who will accept you for who you are.

• Have a recent easily identifiable photo

The number of responses, increase dramatically with a good photograph. Use a fairly recent photo. Avoid unusually flattering, glamour shots; it doesn’t pay to have a discrepancy between the picture and what you really look like.  Don’t have your “significant x” on it! It is really off putting to a potential date, also props like, your cute dog, cats, nieces, nephews, this photo should be about you, a good head shot would be nice.

• Check Spelling and Punctuation

Spell-check your ad. Correct grammar and punctuation.  It’s easier than you think, Word will auto correct your spellings, if you can, get a friend to proofread. Even if this is all on the QT it pays to get it looking right.

• Avoid misunderstandings

Unless you can make eye contact with your potential date, the idea of describing yourself as sexy can be fraught with misunderstanding; Nobody knows how somebody else will interpret something as personal, as humour, or sexiness! For example some of my friends think I’m witty… my children and partner think I’m too caustic!  Big difference. Humour and innuendo are intended to soften, lighten, and divert.  Make sure what your saying makes sense.

• Don’t make a dating profile toooo long.

We all know men easily get bored! On line shopping for them is fun. Their attention can wander pretty quickly. So keep it short, keep to the point, and above all keep them wanting more

Online dating is in our opinion the best way to meet eligable people who share your interests and ambitions. Every year, nearly one hundred thousand people of all ages get married as a direct result of joining an online dating site. Online dating like any dating has a small element of unsavoury people participating hence this advice.

Essential Online Dating Safety Tips

Trust Your Intuition
Your intuition is a powerful tool for knowing when something doesn’t feel quite right. As you read dating profiles, responses to your email messages, have telephone conversations, and meet in person your intuition will help tell you if something is right or wrong. Online dating gives you numerous opportunities to date and so don’t take any chances if something feels wrong.

Don’t Provide Too Much Personal Detail Too Soon
Your home telephone number and your full name will provide an easy way to discover who you are and your address. Armed with your christian and surname, a person can do online searches to potentially discover, where you work and what you do

Use a Free Email Account
Sign up for a free Yahoo!, Hotmail, or Gmail email account that is just for online dating. Never put your complete name in the ‘From’ field – only your first name or something else entirely. My current partner started out with a false name before we decided to meet. This strategy protects you from a person being able to use your usual email address to find out more information about you.

Use a Mobile Phone to Chat
When you decide to chat in person rather than online chat or email, never give out your home phone number. It’s just an added protection until you get to know the person better and build some trust.

Beware of Married Men
It’s unfortunate, but some married men do use online dating services. It’s pretty obvious that they are interested in sex or embroiling you in something you probably don’t need.

Look for Unpleasant Characteristics
As you talk via email and on the phone you may be able to start to pick out some characteristics of the other person. Do they seem to get angry easily? Do they avoid answering some of your questions? Are they controlling? These can be the unpleasant characteristics that tell you this may not be the person for you.

Request a Recent Photo
There’s nothing impolite in asking someone if their photograph’s are recent. If they don’t have a photo then perhaps this is a married person!.  Also, if they tell you the photograph is recent and you meet and see a much older person, then you’ll know the person lied and you can cut the date short if you wish.

Stick to Paid Online Dating
Free online dating services provide a greater opportunity for potentially unsavoury individuals. They don’t need to provide a credit card or any other varifiable information that identifies them. With paid online dating you get what you pay for  including added safety.

Try to Meet in a Public Place.

When it’s time to arrange your first face to face meeting, agree to meet in a public place and provide your own transport. Your first meeting will tell you a lot about the other person, including whether or not they lied in their profile. Never accept an offer to be picked up at your house. Make sure that a friend or relative knows where you are, who you are with and what time you expect to get home. Why not get them to give you a call? You could use this as your excuse to exit if you wish.

Online dating is in our opinion the best way to meet eligable people who share your interests and ambitions. Every year, nearly one hundred thousand people of all ages get married as a direct result of joining an online dating site. Online dating like any dating has a small element of unsavoury people participating hence this advice.

Essential Online Dating Safety Tips

Trust Your Intuition
Your intuition is a powerful tool for knowing when something doesn’t feel quite right. As you read dating profiles, responses to your email messages, have telephone conversations, and meet in person your intuition will help tell you if something is right or wrong. Online dating gives you numerous opportunities to date and so don’t take any chances if something feels wrong.

Don’t Provide Too Much Personal Detail Too Soon
Your home telephone number and your full name will provide an easy way to discover who you are and your address. Armed with your christian and surname, a person can do online searches to potentially discover, where you work and what you do

Use a Free Email Account
Sign up for a free Yahoo!, Hotmail, or Gmail email account that is just for online dating. Never put your complete name in the ‘From’ field – only your first name or something else entirely. My current partner started out with a false name before we decided to meet. This strategy protects you from a person being able to use your usual email address to find out more information about you.

Use a Mobile Phone to Chat
When you decide to chat in person rather than online chat or email, never give out your home phone number. It’s just an added protection until you get to know the person better and build some trust.

Beware of Married Men
It’s unfortunate, but some married men do use online dating services. It’s pretty obvious that they are interested in sex or embroiling you in something you probably don’t need.

Look for Unpleasant Characteristics
As you talk via email and on the phone you may be able to start to pick out some characteristics of the other person. Do they seem to get angry easily? Do they avoid answering some of your questions? Are they controlling? These can be the unpleasant characteristics that tell you this may not be the person for you.

Request a Recent Photo
There’s nothing impolite in asking someone if their photograph’s are recent. If they don’t have a photo then perhaps this is a married person!.  Also, if they tell you the photograph is recent and you meet and see a much older person, then you’ll know the person lied and you can cut the date short if you wish.

Stick to Paid Online Dating
Free online dating services provide a greater opportunity for potentially unsavoury individuals. They don’t need to provide a credit card or any other varifiable information that identifies them. With paid online dating you get what you pay for  including added safety.

Try to Meet in a Public Place.

When it’s time to arrange your first face to face meeting, agree to meet in a public place and provide your own transport. Your first meeting will tell you a lot about the other person, including whether or not they lied in their profile. Never accept an offer to be picked up at your house. Make sure that a friend or relative knows where you are, who you are with and what time you expect to get home. Why not get them to give you a call? You could use this as your excuse to exit if you wish.

Romance is dead – it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.

Dating, reasonable expectations equal good outcomes.

Did you hear about the one who got away? Or was it you that ran away?  The great thing about dating is that isn’t compulsory. You do not have to do it; if you do, then it usually involves a massive leap of faith.  We’ve all heard the tale about the sex kitten that turned out to be a cat; the gorgeous guy form the coca cola adds who turned out to be Mr Bean! Let’s be clear about this, people tell fibs! Me included, I lied about my age, (well it’s a woman’s prerogative isn’t it)?  If you go on a date and decide in an instant that this girl/guy isn’t in any way shape or form, second date material, at least be kind. Walk a mile in their shoes; they probably have very worn soles.  At the very least a drink, a kind word and a bit of banter. You both have online dating in common after all. You will probably gain a friend, a regular online chat, even if it’s hello, how are you, any more dates lined up?  Expectations are sometimes too high; we can behave badly when disappointed. Remember your best friend was once a stranger too