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I am 55 years old and found my partner on a mature dating website. Although we are happy, we have lots of single friends and relatives who will still not try online dating.

The question is – what is the problem? The answer seems to be that for the rest of the population, online dating is fine and dandy but for the older generation there is still a stigma attached.

The most often cited problem is that it smacks of desperation to join an online dating site. To me this is patent nonsense as online dating is simply the fastest way to meet new people and weed out those people you do not want to meet.

If you wanted to eat Beef, you wouldn’t buy a farm and grow some fine tasting pasture grass before buying and raising a cow before slaughtering and eating it. So why would you arrange to go out with mates, stress about what to wear and wonder whether you will bump into a like-minded and attractive member of the opposite gender.  Guess what? It’s a one in a thousand chance and very dispiriting if you don’t. In the same amount of time, you could have sat at home with a cup of tea and shortlisted ten people to contact anonymously with a view to going on a couple of dates.

The next objection to mature dating is that everybody will see your picture! Are you having a laugh is what I say. First of all there are millions of people in the UK and secondly you will certainly never use your real name on an online dating site. So what if someone did see your picture? They would also have to be on the same website as a member and therefore trying the same thing as you.

The next is that they are too fat, too thin, too short, too ugly etc to have anybody fancy them. Well here is the truth of the matter – there is someone out there for anybody and most of us are unhappy with our looks. The size 18 wants to be a size 12 and the size 10 wants to be a size 14! Back to me – I am absolutely nothing to look at. However, I am a cheeky so and so and my girl who is lovely looking loves my sense of humour above all things.
over 50’s dating

over fifty dating

So go on and give mature dating a go and you may never look back.

I guess that none of us thought we would end up on the 50 + dating scene. I certainly didn’t but here I am regardless.

Having been on this website and spoken to other people in the same situation, one thing seems clear. That is that they want to get a move on because as they get older, time seems to be speeding up.

This can cause friction because friends and relatives may believe that relationships are developing with an unholy haste. What they dont get is that faced with your own mortality, you do want to get a move on.

Now, 50 + and lonely is not great but 60 + and lonely is worse in my eyes. I guess it deopends on when the term mature dating kicks in for you.

Not everybody feels the sense of the clock ticking faster but I do. It is that fact that drives me on and I really do enjoy my life. I guess it’s the condemned man syndrome; fixating on my last meal.

The good news is that my last meal is going to be a magificant feast and last twenty years or more.

Here are my top ten dating ideas. Best used when the other person has had  a sheltered life and needs taking out of their comfort zone.

1. Goat herding
2. Whitewash a fence
3. Rat swinging
4. Swap clothes
5. Cardigan knitting
6. Pay and display weekend
7. Photograph park benches
8. Airport carousel observation
9. Air guitar convention
10. Kill time

Thats my top ten over 50 dating ideas. Mature dating! What fun

Is it just me on the over 50 dating scene who judges people to one degree or another in their interest in music or their music choice? Music is my passion and my tastes eclectic, however there is some music that says more about the person that listens to it than it says to me. Take for interest Diva’s such as whitney or maria carey? The sex pistols once asked the crowd “do you feel like you have been had?”. Anybody who enjoys the formulistic bollocks that these women churn out is an idiot or a Princess Di wannabee seeking glamour in somebody else’s guise. This moves me on neatly to anybody who likes R&B. Wrist slitting at worst and depressive at best as even the simplest song is ruined by the ridiculous warbling that these losersc hurn out for the tone death generation. Don’t get me onto rap music!

So what is fun for you? For me its horse racing, live music, travel, cinema, theatre, eating out, ten pin bowling, dancing (badly), murder mystery, youtube, walking the dog, itunes, work, making money, building websites, reading, politics, fresh air, sex, work, cooking, judge judy, fine wine, kids, quizzing and ahundred things more. All of which are great fun choose what your age and whether you are dating or not ( the sex is more fun in two’s). The moral is that you are never too old to have fun.

Keep away from talking about politics they say, paticularly on a first date. The reason being of course that politics causes arguments. I think this myth has been debunked over the last couple of days as pretty much every over 50 I know agrees that PR is nonsense, the labour party desperate, the liberals shabby and the conservatives deserving better. I know that none of this is to do with over 50 dating but it’s my website and so forgive me dear reader for my short rant. Normal service will be resumed tomorrow.

Ok, here’s a recommend. Choose something you have never done before and just go for it. We did with a visit to the Holmfirth Folk festival to see a band called ‘Show Of Hands’ who neither of us had heard of despite them winning every possible award and filling the Albert Hall three times. Blood fantastic being locked in a old music hall with 2000 folkies, loads of beer and a very special woman. Show Of Hands are just amazing and I will now grow a beard and sing folk ballads all the time. Nice thing was that a lot of the audience were my age but could not jig like moi.

Weird how life works out on the over 50 dating scene. I have lovely kids of my own who I enjoyed watching while they grew up. As yet no grandkids and so the Disney movies will have to wait (or so I thought). My new partner who I met on this over 50 dating website had her kids earlier and so she has a 2 year and 4 year old grandchild who are both boys. Bonus!  She is beautiful, sexy and intelligent. In fact, more fun than a barrel full of monkeys and I now have the bonus of Disney movies and kicking a ball around again on top. Lucky me.

Food, guaranteed to be a winner. Keep it simple. No messy spaghetti

Food is part of a time honoured traditional dating activity that never fails to impress.  A good tip is to go somewhere you’ve been before, good food, good wine, good service, eating out can be a “delicious dating experience”.

Be relaxed, be yourself, always be prepared to talk and listen. Expectations can be high; don’t set yourself up for a fall it’s only one date! It’s important to remember what a date is for, getting to know the other person. If first date nerves do kick in, try not to rely too much on alcohol. Nerves can magnify the effects of alcohol; you may get drunk that bit quicker. Alcohol can make you a believer, of almost anything; suddenly you’re saying, doing and feeling things that you wouldn’t normally do, be feel or say.

Having a dessert, or sharing a dessert isn’t off limits though, eating is a sensual, pleasurable experience that’s meant to be savoured.

Good manners count, being rude to a waiter, talking too loudly, or eating with your mouth open will always fail to impress. It will put your date and other diners on edge, so stay polite.

Enjoy your date, the food, and the atmosphere; get to know  each other. Eating out is time well spent, eating “in” is for later!