If you are over 50 and wishing to date men or women younger than you or of your own age – you better know the principles and safety rules of the game! Over 50 dating can be a rejuvenating experience for those who have crossed over from physical youth to youthfulness in spirit! And if you are single, over 50 dating rendezvous can be a steamy and satiating affair – both for the heart as well as the brain!

However, with the innumerable online over 50 dating sites popping up over the web, is it safe to indulge in the way you did when you were young? It is, given that you comply with some of the set standards of over 50 dating precautions.

First, identify the typeset of a partner you want. If you want a laid-back, charming man in whose arms you would feel comforted and safe – choose so. If you want men who are potential Casanovas and wittily endearing, it’s fine again.

However, stay away from men who are overtly sexual in their approach, or show sign of aggression or dominating nature within first few weeks of contact. If you feel threatened in any way, sever the relationship, rather than crying over spilt milk later.

Secondly, stay aware – of your surroundings & your partner. Once you are off on a date, make sure that it is in a public place or restaurant/bar that your family and friends know about. Better still, have a couple of your friends around the place you are going on a date, especially if it is someone you only know through online dating portals and chat-rooms.

Finally, make sure that the guy or girl you have started dating is not into a habitual online dating portal scanner. If he/she is, chances are that he/she may leave you for someone chanced upon in the same online dating site that you guys had used to ignite your romance!

Have all these precautionary mature dating measures check-listed and you will be enjoying your day out in the sun, with your potential life partner by your side, to the fullest!
over 50’s dating

over fifty dating

A flirt is almost never single – and if he/she is, it is of choice rather than chance! So, if you are over 50 and wish to be a player in the game of love- start by learning how to flirt. Now we know that flirting is an art and it only comes naturally, but a few tips to do it better (and to do it, for novices) for over 50 dating sojourns can never it, can they?! Here are 5 tips for flirting with aplomb while on an over 50 dating spree!

1. Break the ‘touch’-screen – Touching can be one of the most sensitive and yet the most warming of subjects in a date. Irrespective of whether you are on your first date or your twentieth, keep touching her subtly and in a romantic way. This is very tricky – Do it more than necessary and you are a pervert; do it less than what she’s comfortable with, and you end up as a bore! Balance is the key here (as it is probably throughout any over 50 date)!

1. Make her/him laugh – Do not keep serious just because you are on the wrong side of 50! Laugh and have fun like you did during your teenage years on a date. Remember, no one likes a sadist or a bore. So make yourself comfortable and make her laugh, even with the old jokes told in a novel way. Stay away from the dirty ones till you haven’t understood your date enough.

1. Compliments are the key – Keep complimenting your date, even if he/she is not particularly well-dressed for your liking. Remember, she might not look gorgeous today, but that doesn’t stop her from looking awesome the next if she is seriously pretty. So hold your patience and learn to keep her flattered!

1. Body Language matters – Make sure you follow her moves (DON’T STARE!) and duplicate the same subtly. This makes her more comfortable (like both of you putting your elbows on the table), and opens her up for love to make it’s way through!

1. Don’t be too perfect in the art – Don’t let it seem practiced or too perfect. This may have two negative consequences – one, she may mistake you for a Casanova or she may mistake your flirtatiousness for being too eager to be in bed with her. Both – are disastrous for a date. Try and be naïve and genuine in your PDA, and try and not be cocky.

These tips may effectively make you a great flirt – but remember- anything remotely obscene or dirty in your mannerisms and you will be out of the dating recce as fast as you had entered it! Caution is the key in every over mature dating episode. And once you know you guys are in love, throw it to the winds!

Over 50 dating is fun; one of the first rules is to have and keep your sense of humour. It is one of the most important things you can bring to relationship. If you go for looks, status or even a specific personality then eventually you could be disappointed. Looks fade, status may disappear, personality’s change, but someone with a great sense of humour which endures even when everything else has gone is worth their weight in gold. Dating someone who has the ability to make you laugh is priceless. Over 50 dating sites are similar to an estate agents window or auto trader, first you look at the photographs, then you read the description…. Sometimes the descriptions can be flawed and the photographs a little misleading. Not so with a sense of humour, you cannot pretend to have a sense of humour you just have! How attractive is that person (regardless of their looks) you’re almost guaranteed to fancy them. So next time you date someone because they have gorgeous legs, or sexy eyes, or a lovely smile. Don’t be fooled straight away Date the guy or gal that makes you laugh remember the old song “make em laugh, make em laugh”  see if they can tickle your sense of humour buds first. If you are on the over mature dating scene then you have enough life stories to make anybody laugh!

Whats the difference between mature dating and over 50 dating? At least over 50 dating is precise whereas mature dating requires a view to be taken. If we called it ‘middle aged dating’ then life becomes a bit easier because the accepted definition is that middle age starts at 55 years old. For me the word ‘mature’ means dull, past it, over the hill, sensible, tyre kicking and boring. Thats why I hope to remain in peter pan mode and stay a million miles away from ‘mature’. Don’t get me wrong, I am neither feckless or senseless. I just hate the connotations that ‘mature dating’ brings hence my decision for an over 50 dating site.

Do you know someone who knows someone who is divorced or separated, therefore single? It’s probably you; I know it’s me… Just a few years ago only one in ten marriages ended in divorce. The office for national statistics now find that 45% of marriages will end in divorce before a couple’s 50^th anniversary if 2005 rates continue, with almost half of these splits occurring before couples reach 10years of marriage…….. Good news for online dating!

Dating then isn’t just for the young and inexperienced. It encompasses all ages. You can date on line if you’re shy and clever, brave and bold, brave and bald… It really is about being prepared to have a go. Dating on line can be a lot of fun, any pre-conceived ideas you have about having to be a 100% perfect before you can go on a date need to be let go of. It is tempting to look at yourself sometimes (especially after a divorce) and think your to short, going bald, getting bags under your eyes, or have wonky teeth, well the truth is if you look around you, all over the world people are fatter, balder wrinklier taller … and they are in happy settled relationships with people who love them. Love is a commodity that never goes out of fashion. It is also e easier to find if you enter an arena of like minded people. On line dating is perfect; you can chat for a short while or a long time. You can exchange information and be selective, you can chat to lots of people at the same time, (need a good memory for this one) just having a go at dating is enough to boost your levels of self esteem.

Things you will regret writing on a dating website

I have read lots of profiles on my 50 dating website and can spot the people less likely to succeed very quickly. Probably the worst (and saddest) profile I read was from a lady who clearly was struggling with life and had posted about living in poverty in a council flat, overweight and with a disabled son. All undoubtedly true but she isn’t giving anybody a chance to see the great attributes she possesses by writing a profile likely to deter people at first reading. Other things you might want to avoid on your dating profile are –

• How many people you have slept with
• A tirade against your ex
• A tirade against the opposite sex generally
• Boast about how much you earn
• Anything that can identify you in real life (the odd nutter about)
• Any lies including age and weight

The lies are always found out. I met a woman who had posted a very old photo, claimed she was an accountant and had her body shape as ‘slim’. What turned up was a twenty stone secretary for an accountancy firm! Now even if I liked her I would still walk away because of the lies. Worryingly, she was probably lying to herself more than to me.

Here’s a list of quotes you never, never use with a man when dating at 50 or any other age-

I would like you to meet my parents (suicide at the end of the first date)

I would love to spend every waking minute with you (so that’s the football and pub gone then)

You make great husband material (no I don’t. I want to be a sex god)

You could work and I will look after the house (that’s early retirement gone then)

Do I look fat in this? (Park your fantasies and let’s get down to reality)

How much do you love me? (Not enough to stop being scared. The net is tightening)

Men are like fish. Tickle them and entice them into the net. Do not club them like arctic seal.

Do you remember how nervous you were on your first date? Was it bravado or bluster that got you through it? Being scared silly of rejection isn’t just for the under 21’s. Fear is a constant, it’s how you react to it that’s key.”Brave People” are the ones that get on with it, they decide that fear is to heavy, they go on dates, put their focus on other people and have a bit of fun. Doing dating is a confidence booster if you have the right tools.

Dating just for fun, lose your fear, don’t expect too much too soon. Be curious about your date; think of all the other experiences you have had, (some good some bad) think of what you might be missing if you don’t enter into the dating arena.

Every beautiful female, and all the manly studs, must have had some doubts at some time.

Confidence isn’t just about being good looking, smooth, intelligent etc… It’s about having a belief system; just believing you are confident is the first step in achieving confidence. Makes you think. Try the following (it works)

• Firm Handshake (Females Included) don’t crush it, or touch it too lightly. A hand held out in friendship sends a message to the recipient. It tells them you are engaging, unafraid, an equal. It works in both a business and personal setting.
• Make eye contact. Eyes are the windows to the soul, what a great cliché. Willingness to meet someone else’s gaze puts you on an equal footing.
• Stand tall, posture counts, a straight back denotes purpose and strength.
• Smile, it convinces people that you are healthy and happy. Frowning is aging!

It’s okay to feel apprehensive on your first date, make sure the adrenalin rush works for you, it is more than likely you have been in this situation before, and survived, what’s the worse thing that can happen? Confidence is that quiet inner voice that controls the more obvious outer show.

If there is one thing I am sure of in life it’s that it doesn’t matter if you are over 50 dating a younger person because you get a chance to showcase your more experienced and steady approach because of it. Obviously, if you want to go out with another person  you dont want to sport a Bobby Charlton haircut and a deep love of the Aldi shopping range and insist that Oveltine is your favourite drink. You need to be young at heart and have loads of get up and go. The real downside is when the years pass and you start to panic (and you will) that they will trade you in for a younger model or disappear rather than live with a pensioner. There is no answer to this at all unfortunately. The only thing you can do is be self confident and stay young at heart.

Over 50, dating and still having fun? Yes that’s me folks and guess what? I am happy just making friends and not looking to marry again. Over 50 and not wanting to settle down makes some eyebrows raise but to me it makes sense because I do not look, act or believe my age is a barrier. My birth certificate is a fabrication visited on me by a impish spirit. I have been down the married and mortgaged route and it all went wrong. It went so wrong that it still hurts like hell to think about it. And so rather than jump in again, I have decided to chill out and make new friends on my over 50 dating site. These friends of whom I now have many are a mix of those like me who just want new friends and lovers and those who really do want to get permanently tied. The one thing I never do is lead people down the garden path in order to achieve intimacy. That wouldn’t be fair and I always try and treat people how I like to be treated myself, with respect.

Some may say that my innings is nearly up and I should be considering my pipe and slippers but I don’t buy into that apocolyptic vision. To me 50 is the new 30 and a good diet and excercise will keep me going strong for a wee while yet. Over  50 dating for me is not a means to an end. It is actually the journey that matters.